- Your English is Engrish while her’s is a notch above that of native English speakers.
- You can only be as creative as typing desi small talk like “Oye Hoye” whereas she blogs about international politics, social dynamics and quantum mechanics.
- “You have fallen in love” with her when all you know about her is how she looks in her synthetic Facebook profile pic.
- The girls physically around you are just too humdrum, too untrustworthy or simply “not your type” whereas every other girl you come across in the webosphere is a perfect match.
- You comment “Looking nice” on at least half of her profile pictures if she has by any chance “befranded” you.
- You send her a bombastic Facebook message telling her how “different” she is when you find her unresponsive to the poetry snippets you posted on her wall.
- If your fail in your attempt at making a connection, it’s always because she’s arrogant.
- You keep saying to yourself: “Ye nahi to aur sahi. Aur nahi to aur sahi”.
- You are always late to educe that the profile of the girl you love more than anything else was fake.
- If she likes one of your posts as a token of courtesy OR starts a chat OR compliments you for something, you conclude she has a crush on you.
- You have tagged her in your flattering self-portraits with you in your best outfit and a pair of sunglasses.
- You’re the mullah type who plans of forcing burqah on your wife whereas she’s someone who roams around the city in sleeveless shirts and tight jeans.
- She’s “your type” in an inverse proportion to her weight and skin tone.
- You’re a misogynist. She’s a feminist. And you still send her a friend request.
- (Even if none of above applies, you end up being called a frandshipper if…) She wasn’t interested.
You may also Like: An actual spam message from a Frandshipper.